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Tag Archives: National Security Agency

Three Branches of Government

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So I read that all three branches of government are now calling for reform of the NSA.

Except, you know, they’re actually not.

Because if they were, it would already be done, wouldn’t it? Don’t the three branches make up the government that is supposed to run the NSA?

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What The Hell Is Wrong With You?

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When I talked yesterday about Brazil buying planes from Sweden instead of the US because of the NSA bull hockey, I figured that we’d start to hear from corporations who were upset about losing business based on the way our government acts with the rest of the world (and its own citizens).

Well, I don’t like to blow my own horn, but…

“Toot, toot.”

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Hitting Them Right In The Wallet

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JAS 39 GripenCongress and President Obama can’t (or won’t) reign in the NSA. The public knows all about their shenanigans, but who has enough power to do something? We, The People? Of course not. They either have or could make up enough dirt on anyone who would matter that they’d shut the whole thing down in about 30 seconds.

Brazil, however…

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Happy Thanksgiving! Love, The NSA

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In a further effort to prove to their employees’ families that the NSA isn’t a global and domestic, bound-overstepping, rule-bending-and-sometimes-outright-breaking, megalomaniacal part of the government, the NSA sent home a document before Thanksgiving outlining some talking points that employees should use around the table or in front of the TV this past Thursday.

Because, you know, they have nothing good to say normally, so they had to come up with stuff. Like this:

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Love Letters From The NSA (or, Hey, Baby, How’d You Like To Get Snowden Together?)

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You must be the Constitution, because I want to violate you.

You must be the Constitution, because I want to violate you.

So The Wall Street Journal reports that some NSA agents have been known to use their technology and unfettered power to track (read: spy on) love interests, both current and past. It’s okay, though – an official estimates that it’s only happened handful of times in the past decade.

Because, you know, we’re supposed to totally trust what the NSA tells us. Why would they lie? It’s not like they can do what they want and then change the laws to make whatever they want to do legal. I’m sure Congress keeps them on a short leash, and Obama has promised us (and Jay Leno!) that there’s no such thing as a domestic spying program in the US.

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